5 Steps to Enable Your Older Child and Your Newborn to Bond: The whole family experiences many changes with the arrival of a new baby. One crucial developmental milestone that you can support in your older child’s growth is the link between them and their new baby brother.
Here are five suggestions for strengthening the link between your infant and older child.
1. Strengthen the relationship prior to delivery
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When told about a newborn, older kids might exhibit a wide range of feelings, from enthusiasm to jealousy. But your older child can form a bond before birth, just like a mother and her infant can. Talk to your child about the baby, regardless of age, and accept her views about how it could change things.
Compare the ultrasound photographs from your older child with the pictures you shared from your own ultrasounds. Let him feel the baby kick and encourage him to chat to your belly. Inquire about their opinions on the baby’s likes and dislikes. Don’t judge your child when they exhibit bad feelings, and keep the conversations light. Your older child’s excitement will grow as you involve them in small decisions like where to place the crib or which onesie to pack for the hospital.
2. Explain to Your Elderly Child His New Position
Clearly defining your expectations for your older child’s new position is another method to assist create possibilities for bonding. Inform him that you will be depending on him to assist in imparting all of his knowledge to the infant. Make it known that even though you want to spend a lot of time with the child, you believe in his ability to be independent. Make him happy about having a new playmate, someone to teach, someone to watch out for, and someone to assist his parents in raising.
3. Assign Special Tasks to Your Elderly Child
Life is busy after a baby is born. Give your older child specific tasks to help out without fear, but don’t forget to express your gratitude for their assistance frequently and sincerely. The bond will get stronger the more involved they are. Get your toddler involved in singing bedtime songs for the infant if you have one. Your elementary-aged child can assist with diaper changes, packing the diaper bag, and selecting the baby’s daily wardrobe. Teens can take care of the infant while you prepare dinner, or the other way around.
Don’t push your youngster to assist if they aren’t interested in doing so. If you force it, the special role will start to feel more like a chore, which could make the newborn and you feel resentful. Try waiting and re-asking in a few days if this is the case.
4. Promote Spending Quality Time with Your Infant
Strong friendships are formed via quality time. There are lots of things to do together that will help your older child and new baby bond. Engage your toddler in gentle play activities with the baby, such as sharing tummy time or peekaboo. Your elementary-aged child probably possesses a lot of skills that he would love to show off to the baby, such as reading, building block stacks, spotting unique textures around the house, and entertaining the infant with acrobatics.
It’s understandable if your adolescent is more focused on her personal life, but even so, brief and tender activities like reading aloud to the child or just holding them can help your teen and you bond deeply. Perhaps even more than a shower.
5. Continue with Family Customs
The abrupt and significant interruptions a baby brings are a major factor in why an older child finds it difficult to form a bond with them. Tell your youngster that although family night, athletic activities, and holidays will still happen, routines will change to accommodate the baby’s demands.
Make sure to maintain any traditions you may have with bedtime reading. Do all within your power to uphold the small traditions you have with your elder child. Your youngster will learn from this that their needs remain our first priority.